Saturday, March 25, 2006

Just watched "V for Vendetta" and left with a bundle of thoughts, as usual. Especially liked the part about ideology, or ideals, and how it is all just fabricated based on individual perspectives and beliefs. That symbols are but mere objects, only empowered by the will and support of the people who believe in them. So if systems are but only in existence because of the presence of people who are there to serve them, why can't they be changed by the people who are vital to its continual existence?

Terrorism and freedom-seeking; just a matter of perspectives? Well the world might poison itself with alot of crap ideals and subjective viewpoints but the bottomline is that all these is but a matter of eloquence and public-speaking, to gather as many followers to empower that belief.

一些有趣的话：

多么想被黑暗笼罩
多么想什么都看不到
但月亮却照亮了伤痕
于是我们开始害怕月亮

-《最游记》

永远有多永久，有多遥远

怎么动不动就说永远

过去到底真的过去了吗

还是残留在今天的密码

Envoy of the Stars @ 10:19 PM
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Darkness or light

Monday, March 20, 2006

I hear many optimistic, uplifting views about Sispec.

I hear many pessimistic, depressing stories about Sispec.

But, above all, I would like to hear my OWN experience in Sispec.

Pointless to say too much.

And so with the spirit of the bayonet, the young/old/enthusiastic/slack private moves forth.

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:03 AM
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Once in a while

Friday, March 17, 2006

Some army pics at this address:

http://starvadeforever.blogspot.com

Envoy of the Stars @ 1:05 AM
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Guard Duty

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Unexpectedly, having to go back for guard duty was not that bad an experience. True I dreaded the thought of ever returning to Pulau Tekong since POP (which happened to be exactly one week ago) but apart from the travelling time, I actually looked forward to doing guard duty, to the last chance of meeting people whom I probably might lose contact with after BMT.

Reporting time was early, in my opinion. We had to be at the infamous Singapore Ferry Terminal by 12.30 when our actual duty started at 6 p.m. A few friends and I had to cab to SFT from Pasir Ris because our replacements were afraid that we would purposely go AWOL and kept on rushing us throughout our MRT trip.

It was a wierd feeling to return to Tekong as privates, instead of recruits. One would go as far to think that the two are almost the same, equally rankless, but it still gives me a rush of contentment to see new batches of recruits marching to and fro, shouting out commands in unison and trying to keep in step, basically doing things we had completed. Talk about vicious cycle in the army, huh? I believe it really spans from such feelings.

We had canteen break at our own time since as I had earlier mentioned, we reached Tekong at such an early timing. Of course we did some minor saigang, like helping to carry the rifles from the repair stores back to the arms scott, helping to count the number of magazines and oiling the rifles one by one. Again I do not understand why but I found myself doing all these with a disturbing peacefulness in my heart. No wonder we homo sapiens are known to have high adaptability rates.

Around 6 p.m, we drew arms. Sadly, I couldn't take W89 out for a last stroll. Guard duty was divided into shifts, each with an interval of 2 hrs. My buddy and I were sent to do sentry at the Tekong Ferry Terminal and we were the third and last shift. First shift begun at 10p.m and I was surprised to find that there were still quite a number of people flocking to Tekong on the last fastcraft. So much for my shift being the quietest one. We walked up and down the aisle of the terminal, cautious to take one step every ten seconds. There was just too much time to burn. A while later, the walkie-talkie I was holding onto suddenly sprang into life, emitting some fuzzy signals. I was like giving responses like "Poor reception. Please repeat, over!" for a good deal 3 minutes before finally hearing a clear response, which was rather irritating. It turned out that the person talking through the walkie-talkie was a mainland Regimental Police (RP) who was simply trying to play with the coms-line. So my buddy and I had half a mind to shout *&%^&&* into the walkie-talkie but decided to just carry on with our conversation session. The number of people leaving Tekong was swiftly declining by now. We were so ready to knock off as the time ticked slowly to 12 p.m when there appeared this guy-with-a-security-pass (don't know if its a sergeant or officer because he was in civilian clothes) who told us to go check on a few people whom he claimed were seen resting on the right platform of the terminal.

So we, as privates who were not any bigger than the recruits we still were one week ago, followed accordingly to his instructions. We approached the group and after a bit of Q and A, managed to find out that they were there at Tekong for a training exercise. (Like duh, what else you expect, someone trying to "bomb Tekong?!", quoted from the guy with the pass) So we politely asked the group to continue with what they were doing. (one or two in green uniforms were snoring throughout the whole inquiry session) My buddy later pointed out that he saw that one of the sleeping guys was a Master Sergeant. So much for doing what you think is right, without fear or favour...

The second shift was rather boring. Having been rudely awaken from my slumber, I had just enough energy to stay awake so basically, my buddy and I just prowled around the ferry terminal, staring at empty seats, hardly uttering a word. I spent most of my time leaning against the railings overlooking the seas, appreciating how round the moon is. Pity it was a starless night. But the rolling waves provided a good therapy for relaxation, and there was so much time to think about anything that comes to the mind.

And with this, I left Tekong with an appreciative heart and a tired mind.

Envoy of the Stars @ 2:49 PM
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很想你

你

在哪里

这些天来如不如意

会否怀念

几个月圆前

鼻中飘散着的气息

是重复的

抱着你入睡

却不能睡得很沉

疼你的责任

梦中的呼唤

半夜的惊醒

只因怕

你被抢走

明明晓得彼此

分手的日期

还是不能自己

付出了一切心力

再轻轻的

Kiss you goodbye

却又难忘

握紧你的感觉

今后

多多珍重了

我的W89

M16 来复枪

Envoy of the Stars @ 1:37 PM
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结

Thursday, March 09, 2006

每个结都是无法解开的铁丝线

紧紧地勒住

折翼的灵魂

前世我造了孽

今世我签了多少约

所欠的

或许是那一千年

谁来吟唱

梁祝的那段蝴蝶结

在如此的季节

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:27 PM
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10小时24公里

Sunday, March 05, 2006

想想我从来也没看过这么多颗星。讽刺的是，这么浪漫的夜景刚好铺展在最不浪漫的德光岛上，而我正在做的也是最不浪漫的事（除非你认为背着一个总重量有大概20公斤的“武装配备”走24公里路是件超浪漫的事，那我无话可说），跟的更是一群懂得浪漫但决不会在这个时候把浪漫拿出来表现的阿兵哥们。

“今夜星光多美好，适合用寂寞去凭吊。”

无奈寂寞不在，因为耳边多的是调子走得七八头牛都拉不回来的军歌。凭吊的或许只是那早已逐渐处于麻木状态的知觉。四周的黑暗正好与脑中的空白相映，但却不怎么成趣，因为当你有了如此亲身体验后，你也不会对这样的画面产生多大的兴趣。

凉风吹得是那么漫不经心，但它的每一点施舍都变成了令我们完全心领神会的恩赐。

穿过的树林（我们其实真的是穿着“树林”走路的，迷彩的制服本就是为了让兵士在树林中藏匿用的）都充满了敌意，仿佛还能隐约听到树叶的低声嘲谑，还能感觉到堆满尖石的沙地对我们展开的无声抗议，和它在每次得逞时所发出的难以抑制的奸笑。我们却只是盲目地向着一个毫无目的的目的地前进。

到了后来，那弯月也放弃了对我们的陪伴，而偶然抬头，也只剩下天边那一颗发亮的星一路尾随。仔细一看，那一颗星旁其实还有更多颗星。星光有强弱，但都一直为彼此而闪烁。我一直怀疑自己还没倒下的谜，忍不住望了望身边这一群兵友，突然张开那沙哑的喉咙，逼出了一连串的音节。

Envoy of the Stars @ 1:59 PM
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有感

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

韩寒在《毒》中有这一段摘录，大概是：

“和一个女孩子关系太好，说的话太多了，反而只能做朋友而不能做女朋友。”

有道理。

Envoy of the Stars @ 6:04 PM
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