抓不到的到不了

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

有些东西明明放在眼前,却是再怎么伸手,也无法触碰的。

就像玩夹夹乐时,越是想要夹到一见钟情的玩偶或饰品,但就算费了凭空生出来的耐力与技巧,也往往事与愿违。即使牢牢抓到了瞬间的喜悦,又能持续多久,是否又是一个喜新厌旧的考验?

每个人的愿望或许很难实现,但在某个角落的小小快乐,依旧在等着。

Envoy of the Stars @ 8:37 PM
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Yes Man

It doesn't take alot to say "yes" but we say "no" more often than not. I know, for one. So I surprised myself when I said "yes" to watching a movie when it was totally unplanned. (adding onto the list of unexpected things I encountered this december) And yes it actually reaped more benefits than I would have thought. At least I feel better, especially after having watched a particulary heavy Jdrama.

Basically, this is a feel-good movie which proposes that saying "yes" opens one to more opportunities which branches out into yet more chances, and if they deal with socialisation, it helps you "get going" (to bars as one of the choices and drinking yourself silly or getting laid ) and have more of "a life". The protagonist is talked into forming a resolution that he should say 'yes' to every opportunity that comes knocking on his doors. But of course with all the unexpected turns along the way comes the underlying truth that one should only say "yes" if he/she really wants to, to show one's true intention. Always favoured Jim Carrey's brand of humour in the form of overexaggerated facial expressions and constant blabberings and this film was no exception in delivering just that.

Saying 'yes' often involves commitment and an initiative that will otherwise be optional, even unrequired, a clearcut 'no' being a clean denial to offers or questions. Perhaps I have been riding on this convenience for too long, such that it becomes a habit. Being ever ephemeral, a change in this stagnant will probably be a breakthrough. I wonder what things I can say 'yes' to...

Resolutions to 2009 shall... be a secret, well if there are any.

Envoy of the Stars @ 3:01 AM
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Life

Someone asked me this question once, before relishing the sight of me searching in vain for an answer.

The question was simple, as most tough ones normally are. "What is life?"

I didn't avoid the question nor respond with any of those cheesy lines from the bank of movie quotes in my mind. Basically I just gave the casual shrug (which is an answer now that I think about it because it can be interpreted as life is uncertainty... right.) and the "I-don't-want-to talk-about-this. Period" look. Truth was, I wasn't too much in the mood to answer then, because the setting was in an a*my camp and we were having our well-deserved break after a day of gruelling training and any philosophical, smartypants attempts will earn nothing more than a few swear words and much disapproval. (power of the group in full play)

Fastforward this episode by 2 years plus and I think even if I were in the mood to answer then, or am now, it will be like trying to get the decreasing exponential curve to touch the x-axis. Ahem... So I can only say, quite simply, that

Life is living.

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:33 AM
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幸福分子

Thursday, December 25, 2008

夹道上落英缤纷

留下深浅不一的斑斑吻痕

纪念沉浸在彼此世界一对对恋人

经过的行人,走过的树木

有无生命的风景一幅幅

岸边流水打趣观望

羞涩、温热、轻声细语、浓情蜜意

藏匿于空气中的分子

凑成循环性拼盘

这季节调色最适合粉红

这么说你又会自言自语了

对色彩不甚敏感

执著于浪漫

的一分子

“爱情是种让人趋之若鹜的非卖品”

带着三分若有所悟的你装得很哲学

我知道

答案在解读你表情时揭晓

这种氛围已把你围绕

让你迫切想寻找

幸福的味道

Envoy of the Stars @ 3:26 PM
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Jordan Hill Music Video

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

A song for lovers and friends, young and old, human or ghost. From the classic movie "Casper". Enjoy.

Envoy of the Stars @ 2:19 AM
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反思

Monday, December 22, 2008

“你不是真正的快乐。”我说。

说话的人这么想着。

“你为什么活着?”我想都不想的问。

不为什么理由,是不是也是一种理由。说话的人这么想着。

我想唱一首歌来复制幸福。把感动当成一种煽动...

用幸福点缀着彼此的脆弱。说话的人这么想着。

我想淋一点雨。淋了不会生病那种雨。

说话的人这么想着。

我想头也不回,忘了爱恨继续往前走。

说话的人一直这么想着。

Envoy of the Stars @ 3:03 PM
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2008 Checklist

Monday, December 15, 2008

又到了每年的小总结,有遗憾,有新鲜,有突变,有定格。有随心所欲、“千金散尽还复来”的逍遥游;有周而复始,“无为有处有还无”的循环。

If I were to break the year down into two halves, I think it is safe to say that the first half cannot be disconnected from RT life. Strangely that period has become rather distant, but I suspect a reason for this can be attributed to the shift in identity from teacher back to student, or worker back to non-worker. In any case, those were definitely fun times, besides just doing the job, the company earned was an unexpected but indefinitely pleasant surprise.

Most in the RTU.

KL trip.

Once again, my class 3K. 4K soon... Have fun people! Recent realisation of how those younger than you have grown old really make me feel old.

去探访余老师,当时尝到瓜甜,今日唱到稻香。

无数个月圆月缺,又约在同样一个地点。

The K-sessions



The overseas ventures..

Hokkaido Getaway with family.

Dream team'08. We had all the Pho, popiah and cau lao (still don't know how to spell) we yearned for but of course, there's never enough. Must start constructing next plan.. Egypt? India? Greece? China?

この間わたしたちで旅行にした時はとても楽しかった。お元気で、みんな。また会いましょうね。To Weizhuang and Eugene, all the best and have fun overseas.

And of course,



The sheer amount of exposure is telling enough. I think "The Clique 社" (whatever meaning the name holds) has done well this year. "Reports" (rather photos) show that we have conducted more meetings to hold our "careless whispers" sessions, which largely include uncountable gossip moments with recycled topics as all-time-favourites and heart-to-heart talks that normally takes place when everyone is groggy from lack of sleep. In any case, do keep this up.

Major happenings in 2008.

1) Picked up a new language. 日本語がまだ下手なので、もっと勉強をしなければならない。今回は絶対にあきらめない。

2) One year O*D anniversary

3) Uni-life.. which is about sipping tea in the canteen reading through some notes or enjoying a nice chat with friends.

4) David Tao and Wang Lee Hom both had their concerts conducted here this year and they were spectacular! Whoots, but once again missed out Eason's..

5) Reestablished connection with my piano that had been lying quietly at the side of my study room, watching over my changes all these years despite my constant neglect. I couldn't describe why I suddenly feel like playing again, but it is definitely a good way to spend time with oneself.

6) Enlarged my Stitch collection reasonably. Well, pretty much so.

7) A sharp preference for logic to sentimentality.

8) J-drama fever. I think I completed more than 10 series this year, maybe more. The thing I like about Jap drama is they are shorter (about 10-11 eps per series) as compared to say Korean (think "Jumon") and Hong Kong serials. Personally I find the story plots more tightly packed and hence more engaging. Fukuyama Masaharu 福山雅治 is simply too cool!

And with that ends this very egocentric entry, for now.

Envoy of the Stars @ 10:37 PM
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Life's Expectancies

Daily occurrences are but inevitable, because they are based on a simple case of probability.

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:16 AM
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四方盒的Hangover

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Having the luxury of time encompasses many possibilities. Sometimes I just hope that time can be really saved and deposited, to be retrieved at will when one needs them. But of course, somethings exist as fantasies. 妄想が現実にならない。

Firstly I will like to share about this show Maou 魔王, a Japanese remake of the popular Korean drama "The Devil". I remembered seeing posters around the train stations when I was in Japan back in July when it was aired. It is a psychological thriller about this two-faced lawyer who quietly executes his revenge under the guise of a kind protector of the weak, all the while being tracked down by a detective with a dark past that was central to the whole plot. It definitely sounded abit like a cross between Death Note and Code Geass (if you have no idea what these two titles are it's ok... just think of a vast complexity of mind games, abit like The Departed or 无间道) but above all, I think the emotions are much more comprehensible, and it is easier for audience to empathise with the characters and the suffering and repression they are experiencing. The same underlying messages disseminated in many other drama with vengeance as its main theme are perpetuated here, which is that ultimately, enmity, vindication and revenge will involve innocent parties and once it is in full swing, it is a road of no return, even if there appears a tinge of hesitation or regret.


Another is a Korean movie "A Man Who Was Superman", which is actually quite a recent one starring Jeon Ji Heon 全智贤. The film turned out more thought-provoking than the title suggested and as the plot unravels, a new light is thrown on all the seemingly disjointed and meaningless pieces and melded with the Korean brand of sentimentality, it leaves one with a warm and somewhat enlightened feeling after watching it. The abnormal, erratic behaviour of a grown man who goes about helping strangers in an almost comical way while claiming to be Superman who has lost his superhuman powers but not his desire to help others. The cynical, unimpressed reporter adopting the bystander attitude whose sole interest is to use him as a source to produce a hit documentary. And their interaction reveals this: that apathy is too much ingrained in everyone that the power of goodwill has been forgotten. I am reminded of a book I read titled K-Pax, about a man who claimed to have come from the planet K-Pax and provided purporting evidence for that claim, and how he went on to help many psychological patients face their own problems in the hospital he was admitted into.

力量并不能打开最坚实的铁门,一把小钥匙却已足够,而每个人心里都有一把钥匙,只是还没察觉。超人只是一个幻想,是普通人心中对于不平凡的盼望。影片的最后,我却看到超人的遗骸,凡人的姿态。看了不禁让我想起,荧幕上,荧幕下都是许多人心中永远的超人的Christopher Reeves.

Envoy of the Stars @ 10:50 PM
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宇多田ヒカル - Eternally -Drama Mix-

Sunday, December 07, 2008

Another great song by Utada Hikaru, the OP for the J-drama "Innocent Love". There's no pv out yet, so for now hopefully the song will suffice.

Envoy of the Stars @ 10:04 PM
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Absence

"Blessed are the forgetful, for they get the better even of their blunders." -Nietzsche

"How happy is the blameless vessel's lot! The world forgetting, by the world forgot. Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind! Each prayer accepted and each wish resigned."--Eloisa to Abelard, Alexander Pope
Perhaps ignorance is bliss. Perhaps... but we probably won't get the better of ourselves, or our own impulses.
Erasing those residual memories of a person, like haunting melodies strangely hollow but crying out with a demand for importance, borders on existentialism. Whether the person still exists physically is one thing, but whether that person exists in your world is another. What would existence be if the world doesn't recognise yours? What would memories be if they are not shared by anyone apart from yourself?

Envoy of the Stars @ 4:59 PM
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Interpretation of a Dream

Wednesday, December 03, 2008

I seem to remember this image in a dream many moons ago...

Seen through the lenses of a lone umpire, searching for players in an empty court. What was the game again?

天涯路,未归人。路在风尘,人在等待。
Lost among stillness, a constant among variables...

A blurred existence in a clearly realistic world.

これは夢か現実か、もうわからない。そして、知りたくない。

The green light, a red man.

A seemingly endless road and the long march to.. wherever the dream ends.

I seem to remember this image in a dream many moons ago... The same moon, a shrouded mystery in a night so blue.

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:39 AM
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Cape No.7

Monday, December 01, 2008

お久しぶり、この気持ち。

My emotions normally run dry but this time I was moved. Truth be told, I thought the underlying plot of having a regrettable love story of old strung acting as a backdrop against the main storyline of a bunch of shoddy individuals who have long become numb with life, hastily grouped together for a one-time performance to actualise their dream was rather old-skool. But the cliche here worked well, because the whole movie was playing on the 'song' bit, although it is definitely a different style from 881.

I think it was just the sight of seeing underdogs winning over the audience, and having all of them, regardless of age and style, working together as a group, pursuing a night of colours and dreams.
平凡变得很漂亮。刹那真的是永恒。
还蛮喜欢戏中的台词,是日本教师在离开他的学生恋人后写给她的信中的内容。当然有点淡淡的哀伤。“我知道,思念這庸俗的字眼將如陽光下的黑影我逃他追…我追他逃…一輩子。”

Envoy of the Stars @ 11:53 PM
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