Moving Castle

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

SHE's concert was extremely entertaining, with only a downside: the extremely loud surround sound system. My ears were buzzing even after the concert because half the time throughout the duration I have music blasting directly at my ear drums. But I guess it's quite worth it, because the three of them have definitely improved in their vocals and stage presence.

Ella was smart, ok everyone says that, but I think we tend to overlook her feministic touch to certain songs, or her more ladylike appearances. Perhaps her cool personality is more remembered for giving that balance to the group, or maybe she is just stereotyped. Selina's performance was dazzling, her solo dance would surely be well etched in our memories. It was a bold attempt, something you would expect from Jolin Tsai, but I believe every artiste needs a breakthrough now and then. Lastly we come to Hebe, who was of course, subjectively, the best. Ok even objectively her singing sounds firm, her performance is steady and her music blending was very natural, except she probably can pull off a greater show if she can master the microphone. 但真的只有四个字形容：赏心悦目。Oops I so rarely practise bigotry but there is always a first.

Still, if I have to rate the concerts I have been to so far. This will be a rough gauge:

Best musicality: David Tao “就是爱你”
Best talent showcase: Lee Hom “盖世英雄”
Best entertainment: SHE
Most emotional: JJ Lim

I must admit I still liked David Tao's concert best. His live performances definitely sweep me off my feet. His song arrangement, mood setting, emotions are all neatly presented. His voice is very engaging and his concert so professional. Now looking forward to Jacky Cheung's concert in July. Yeah!!!!

Envoy of the Stars @ 2:09 AM
-------------------------------

Crash

Saturday, January 27, 2007

My computer pulled a stunt on me when I discovered it crashed like a ship upon collision with an iceberg the moment I returned home today. So there was only my sister greeting me with an apologetic look. I just realised how dependant people like me and maybe you have become on technology, like computers, internet, Playstation, handphones... ... I was so flustered, so I am now borrowing the computer from my friend's house to type this entry.

Talk about having a good weekend... but then there is SHE's concert that will help to lighten the mood and loosen things up abit. I just realised my sources of entertainment are quite limited, although it comprises of two wide categories: books and music.

Alright, looking forward to SHE's concert, especially Hebe's solo performance. Oops! I guess some things won't change.

Envoy of the Stars @ 10:05 AM
-------------------------------

悼红

Sunday, January 21, 2007

每个人都常说要向前看。不过有时能够回头一下，才会发现自己走得有多远了。当一个人的眼神、微笑开始被遗忘取代，这是蜕变还是成长，抑或变身。所以惊觉原来照片、以往的文字，这些东西清澈如镜，但倒映出的面孔又有多生疏，又是不是你所满意的，认识的那个人？

去年的农历新年景物，今年的入伍新兵，画面那么旧，那么新。五味已杂陈，杂尘却未舞。

读红楼心理分析时，看到这个课题：“怡红公子的悼红情结”。所以，不才如我弘子也效其悼红。

《悼红》

金缕衣，君莫惜。少年痴，谁言提？

偏生宝黛玉不齐，石沉枝落鸟投林。

锋芒劲，是非易。一夫关难当，则市隐韬光。

寰宇茫茫微尘依，烟云渺渺清水流。

何如？任天席地一生就。

Envoy of the Stars @ 7:54 PM
-------------------------------

荒唐言

Friday, January 19, 2007

你说你在等死
我说我在苟活
悲观的黑色云朵
在我们心上停泊

都是在逃脱
昨天的枷锁
明天的揣度
最后不敌一个如果

过去现在将来
如果如果如果
转了个弯还是避不开曾经的
措、错、挫

Envoy of the Stars @ 5:26 PM
-------------------------------

Dream, dream, dream

Saturday, January 13, 2007

《念奴娇》

大江东去，浪淘尽，千古风流人物。
故垒西边，人道是：三国周郎赤壁。
乱石崩云，惊涛裂岸，卷起千堆雪。
江山如画，一时多少豪杰。

遥想公瑾当年，小乔初嫁了，雄姿英发。
羽扇纶巾，谈笑间、强虏灰飞烟灭。
故国神游，多情应笑我，早生华发。
人间如梦，一尊还酹江月。

真想下江南... ...

I must be really bored. I am trying to keep myself occupied with literature and psychology. So I borrowed Freud's "The Interpretation of Dreams" and another chinese book which talks about the psychoanalysis of "Dream of the Red Chamber".

Must be in a really dreamy state these days. But then again, at the risk of sounding cliche, life is but a dream.

Envoy of the Stars @ 10:08 PM
-------------------------------

Blood on our hands

Sunday, January 07, 2007

"Blood diamond" was just as I expected, a political film, but with a humanistic approach. Child soldiers. Fatherly love. Fight for survival and for a ticket to escape a hellish world. Man's greed. Aggression and exploitation. Hypocrisy of supposedly civilised societies.

Sometimes my friend will ask why do I keep going to watch such tragic films, those that evoke such misery and distress that a prolonged intake will result in numbness and apathy. Just like what the female journalist Jennifer Connelly said in the heat of a moment.

"Why should I help just him (a Black father who is in search of his lost son) when there are millions like him out there?" She pauses, before slapping her forehead and continuing, "I can't believe I said that."

I find it hard to believe we will do these things too, but I guess when disaster, mayhem, catastrophe, tragedy and chaos are too distant from us, we eventually find it hard to become attached to all these which is plaguing another part of this planet we are living on, to the extent we are totally ignorant or unfeeling.

"They say the soil in Africa is red because of the blood that has spilled on it." Actually, there are few lands in this world with soil that is not stained and soaked in blood. We are always fighting. For minerals, gold, oil, and now, diamonds. Things that aren't even key to our continual sustainance and existence. I still remember the other movie "Munich" which reminded me that we can kill for things we can't even physically see. Like religion.

And how is writing about such crap going to help change things. Well it won't. But I just want to vent some frustration, and hopefully raise some awareness. That's why I will follow my path. Meet my needs, reduce my wants. Some friends don't understand why I don't have the same goal as them, to earn more money, live in luxury, buy a condo, if not a bungalow, eat in restaurants.... But to me, I only need enough, and I rather give the extra to others who can't even meet their needs. That's why I foolishly believe in wealth distribution, and sometimes I scorn at my idealistic self and that naive, almost dimwitted thoughts.

"There are no good or bad people. There are only normal people. It's when they do good things that make them good people."

"When peace comes, this place will become a paradise."

If we put our blood and sweat on the things that can truly bring along this paradise, wouldn't it be better than shedding blood by killing off each of our own.

Envoy of the Stars @ 2:04 PM
-------------------------------

Anniversary

Saturday, January 06, 2007

The one year anniversary of my dear introduction to my current life came and passed in a flash. I only hoped the people whom I have met this time last year are all doing well in their respective fields, or at least, surviving like my peers and I.

I have not come across anything that resembles such a love-hate relationship like the one I am experiencing with A%r* now. I owe alot to it for making me stronger, but really detest it for its involvement in my youth, for all the mortification and blows it has dealt me. But I guess what doesn't kill....

Here I must thank all the people who have endured those times with me. Even though some of your faces are slowly fading away, those scratches, bruises and verbal abuses will probably not fade away anytime soon. Haha what a way to put it but those are probably what we will find closest to our hearts, since they are the ones that brought us nearer.

I don't know how this has turned into a thanks-giving entry but I should also give credits to my radio which has kept me company, especially throughout those cold and dark nights as I laid on my bed thinking about nothing but outfield training the next day and the challenges that await. Some people ask me how I have become so familiar with all those chinese songs but it shouldn't be too difficult to understand if you have heard them over and over again, even when you wake up in the middle of the night and can still hear it playing beside your ears.

Tank's 三国恋 that has given me the drive and momentum for SOC. David Tao's 蝴蝶 for the determination and perseverance to finish Si*p*c. Lee hom's "Kiss Goodbye" for the bittersweetness during the Tekong days.

2007 has officially started. I see the familiar traffic congestion during my bookout, the sight of students clad in uniform swarming shopping centres after school hours and the cleanly shaven recruits taking in some fresh air from civilisation now and then. 07 might not be a happy year as of yet, but once again, to all who are contented with life, stay that way and to the rest, let's just try harder.

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:22 PM
-------------------------------

Opening

Monday, January 01, 2007

Let the slate be wiped clean again, a new page turned and a new musical chord struck.

Watched three movies last week last year. Curse of the Golden Flower, Death Note and Confessions of pain.

All three left me awestruck. I sat frozen in my seat, my mind blank after the last two movies especially. They are really impactful, at least to me.

看完了只有两个字：震撼。

黄金甲是视觉震撼。华丽背后的腐朽，金玉其外的败絮其中。张导，说故事有一套，有些人可能嫌老套，但拍摄手法还蛮独树一帜的，情感拿捏够细腻，懂得用人，分配演员角色。比起让人看了会窒息的《十面埋伏》饱满多了。

Death Note2 was just tragic. I find it satirical and spilling with black humour. How one gets consumed by his over-indulgence in self-proclaimed justice and righteousness. How far one can go to construct his imaginary world and dominate as the all-powerful dictator. I like the part Death God Remu sacrificed him/herself, to protect the things he/she wants to. That was like the most unhumanly humane act throughout the whole show.

《伤城》是我三部中最喜欢的。很意外，因为我不觉得故事有很出乎意料。但还是喜欢，可能有所体会，可能投入太多。单是看梁朝伟那一幕对一切的招认与控诉，看他说着说着，语气没变很多，却突见一行眼泪就这样滑下鼻梁。伤是那么的深，深到看都看不见，听都听不出，只透过瞬间的脆弱中显露，过后又静止麻木。看金城武纸醉金迷，却最是清醒，看清楚一切又是那么痛苦，就算想醉又谈何容易。酒本就是不想醉时最易醉；最想醉时最不能醉。人生不也如此吊诡。

“酒的好喝，就因为它难喝。”

So that was for movies. Moving on to other things, Zhehan was like saying that the date we are so looking forward to can at least be seen on the calender, finally. Now even I have to admit that is rather motivating thought. So he was asking what will I do on the last day and I replied with these three things:

1. 转身离开
2. 说声bye bye
3. 别再重来

I will remember how I dreaded this day last year, the fear of venturing into the unknown I felt, and the uncertainty and insecurity of being helplessly stranded in a place where you are, but one out of hundreds, thousands, ten thousands and so on. But that was last year.

For now

Curtains are drawn,

the scripts torn

Take a bow,

step up right

into the awaiting light

Ready for the first take?

The world is your stage.

Envoy of the Stars @ 10:30 PM
-------------------------------