Innocence

Sunday, August 26, 2007

My nephew bounded towards me first thing when he saw me when we went to pay respects to my late grandmother at the temple. Emitting a loud cry of "小小舅", he held my hand and promptly lead me to a quiet corner where he exposed his hidden agenda for showing such enthusiasm on seeing me.

It turns out he is a great pokemon fan and wanted to talk about pokemon with me, (He's five only) after my mum graciously gave away all the pokemon toys and stickers I had in my possession back then in sec 1 and alerting him to the fact that he had an "uncle", (omg that sounds sooo old) albeit a young one, who presumably knows a whole lot about his numero uno interest.

So he tested me on whatever residual remnants of pokemon related knowledge I have. It's a surprise but having put all that behind me for years, I still could catch up on what he was saying. But then again, it's just so difficult to wave him off when his face is radiating with excitement as though he has finally found a "grown-up" who can understand his world. Haha... It just feels weird but enjoyable. Looking at him talking with such energy and eagerness, I can't help but smile.

When he thought he succeeded into tricking me with his antics, he will laugh uncontrollably with this playful and cunning twinkle in his eye. And as he was showing me his prized treasures: stacks of pokemon magnets and little discs, I realised it is not just a gesture of sharing something he likes with someone who he feels can appreciate it, but also a bridge of trust between a kid and a well, young grownup. It is the same connection I established with his mother, my cousin, back then when I was the kid, when she would bring me out, buy me toys, even after getting married. Some things just continues in a cycle.

Ya my nephews and two nieces are very cute, even though they do fight and scream at each other, run around abit hyperactively while playing catching and making everyone else worry about their safety. But even though I find it enjoyable playing with them and understanding their world, it remains a firm fact that I will never work in a childcare centre, or teach in a primary school (especially p1-2) because I think I will just die of exhaustion or helplessness, or both.

And on a side note, the little one was sitting beside me in my car on our way to my grandfather's when he pointed towards the passing trees outside the window and exclaimed, “你看那些树一直在跟踪我们。”

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:47 PM
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时机成熟

Saturday, August 25, 2007

黑色柏油路

参差杂沓的脚步

模糊了当初

汗水挥洒的记录

歌声、喊声、风雨声

拉近我们对彼此的觉悟

故事快落幕

开始注定的结束

来得特别辛苦

这场游戏真实得残酷

残酷得不能认输

不能认输却又锤炼出倔强的不甘伏诛

只为不想重复

等待最无辜

你在outfield一身倦怠化作一颗树

我用鲜血供献蚊子与自然为伍

搞不懂寝室总有人乱丢衣服

厕所马桶还在怀念你握的抹布

你请病假一脸无悔还要装糊涂

我在日历上东算西算努力倒数

迫不及待时机一到破茧而出

蝴蝶飞散留下的只是无声的祝福

Envoy of the Stars @ 2:09 AM
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旅行的意义

透过窗外一片落叶
看世界
它乘着风毫无目的地飞
飘荡多远无所谓
至少试过征服听说过的大江南北
尽管命运一早将其归类
短暂一生困于方圆
直到最后向大树挥别
它的下坠
衔着一片睡前的愉悦
是对我的永诀

Envoy of the Stars @ 1:53 AM
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回忆感冒

Sunday, August 19, 2007

一桌几包绿茶

课室红色门把

笑声肆意在风中涂鸦

校园是本漫画

读过该放下

收藏无数真心话

哪些念念不忘

电话号码

只是几页摆设吧

发边沾过的风沙

镜子揭发的新疤

仿效昨日的步伐

太阳仍是这么大

影子却先放弃挣扎

相聚若是月牙

时隐时现受乌云打压

直到久违的再见

无以复加

回忆是偏执去邂逅曾经

只怪我们太傻

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:32 AM
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Childhood

Saturday, August 11, 2007


Finally got my favourite robot figure from mecha (robot) series Gundam Seed Destiny. For those who don't know, this is ZGMF-X20A Strike Freedom, but of course this is just a small replica instead of the 1/100 scale model I have been eyeing since two years ago. I have been taking the box off the shelves and putting it back for a forgotten number of times, and this sort of reminds me of eons ago when I was a child in a Toy Department, except this time I wasn't looking at my parents with that pleading expression in my eyes and receiving a firm and finalised "no" each time, but rather wrestling with my rationale alter-ego which manages to emerge victorious time over time.

For a side note, no I am not a supporter of Transformers, even though many guys happen to be and it has become a sort of trend, amidst the retro fever and movie craze. But I am just not impressed by talking robots who can transform into harmless cars (except for the baddies, who are either tanks, fighter planes or missle-launching jets, all ready to blast their house-car counterparts into oblivion)

Was at Cineleisure and happened to see many people cosplaying. But I could only recognise a few characters those people were posing as, but apart from the costume that can at least make the cut, the cosplay groups weren't exactly fantastic. My friend reminded me that their effort should be applauded though, especially in Singapore, where anime culture is still very much subtler and suppressed to a certain extent. "In a way, cosplay is like acting, once you are in the costume and assuming that character, you are no longer who you are."

Watching anime these days just fill me with wild thoughts, like how interesting it will be if I can work for now as a voice actor, creating an anime character and defining it's personality. In a way it's just like an actor, but one in a fictitious, made-believe, fantasy world, where everything is so much more possible, with lesser restrictions of that in reality. It may even be more challenging to give life and a soul to an originally 2D image. Just like how I used to wonder whose voices Woody and Buzz Lightyear belong to, voice casting was just one of the hidden ambitions I had, since childhood.

Envoy of the Stars @ 9:24 PM
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弦的余音

Thursday, August 09, 2007

周蕙《不想让你知道》

忽然不想让你知道
在我心中
你多重要
既然你要自由
你就得到
让你永远都记得我好
忽然不想让你知道
你的爱我已经戒不掉
就让思念淹没
我不想逃
反正你将永远不知道
今夜星光多美好
适合用寂寞去凭吊
我们曾用爱互相依靠
付出多少不用计较
想一个人多美好
就算只剩记忆可参考
被爱放逐到天涯海角
我的思念你不用都知道
直到有天你我年老
回忆随着白发风中闪耀
至少我清清楚楚知道
你若想起我会微笑

听她的歌从来不记得歌名，但旋律总是刻骨铭心。她的歌，是有灵魂的，歌词有耐人寻味的荡气回肠，结合了她如天籁般的嗓音，很完美。很动人。这种歌很危险，因为往往杀伤力是无形的，未察觉就被莫名的感动情绪偷袭，跟着而来的，就是那些已尘封了的东西。所以，听听就好。

但还是喜欢她歌中的坚强，和隐藏其中的那种阳光总在风雨后的微笑，无奈得真潇洒。

Envoy of the Stars @ 2:02 AM
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Run

Sunday, August 05, 2007

I realised I am getting addicted to running. Nowadays the shortest run I take will at least cover a distance of 7km, and as AHM draws near, there is progressive training to prepare everyone for the eventual 21km run.

After so many runs, I conclude that running is really a test of mental strength more than anything else, especially for long distances. I will never have expected to run a gold timing for IPPT back then in secondary school, and I remembered laughing along with my other friends as to who will be so foolishly gungho to push themselves so much. And obviously I have now become the subject of my own idea of a joke back then. Back then even during J1 when I last ran the Macritchie route, I couldn't even gather the will power to finish the run without stopping. This week after running a longer extension of the same route, I once again learnt that giving up is really just an option that you can forgo.

It's all in the mind, as cliched as it sounds. But some things are really simple, and I am glad that running is one of them. Although it may appear as an individual sport, I actually clock better timings with company, people to motivate wordlessly and pace quietly. But the satisfaction of finding someone who matches your speed and pace is irreplaceable, and nothing beats a nice good run to start the day and lift one's spirits.

Envoy of the Stars @ 12:17 AM
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Not Ready to Make Nice

Saturday, August 04, 2007

They say beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder, when one finds another. Some say fat is beauty, only back in the olden days.

We argue over inner beauty versus outward appearances, but the former is indefinable and infinitely subjective, and the latter easily carved out by plastic surgery.

Deep down within the self-denials and consolations, therein lies superficiality, and that visually-inclined nature which awaits awakening.

Envoy of the Stars @ 3:39 PM
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不能说的真的不能说

Friday, August 03, 2007

有幸参加了《不能说的秘密》的首映。与较早前造势户外活动的千人阵势相比，首映礼上戏院内少了喧哗，多了典雅。周董偕同桂纶镁上台致词，感觉他真的今非昔比，早期的腼腆害羞、沉默寡言已成过去式。人会变，何况万千宠爱集一身的天王。桂纶镁全场沦为称职的花瓶，话只说的刚刚好，真人看起来清秀、很有气质，又会弹钢琴。嗯，不错不错。可惜可惜。

电影观后感是，够感人，超出了我个人的期望。因为起初不很看好，所以接二连三的惊叹号更容易使人拍案叫好。以本人愚见，可看性主要浓缩成以下几点：

1. 眼光独到，选对人
女主角公认属气质型，一颦一笑牵动人心，每个眼神都是戏，开朗得调皮可爱，伤感得楚楚可怜，周董算是有眼光，懂得用人。而深知自己演技所长，继续演才华洋溢的音乐才子是上上之策，他最拿手，最能掌握，有些对白根本就像是为周杰伦，而非剧中的叶湘伦设计的。所以演回自己的选择很明智，更能贴近观众，得到认同。

2. 故事情节出乎预料
不管你是否听到很多相关的传闻，抑或阅读了报章杂志的揣测，电影中所指的秘密是关键，是它的卖点，所以奉劝有兴趣去观赏的人不要想太多，看了就知道了。惊喜指数本人给予四颗星。故事的twist绝对意想不到。多少要归功于周杰伦吧。懂得从人们意想不到的地方下手，攻人个措手不及，他的这个战略凑效了。

3.看他耍帅
可以期待他多次弹钢琴的耍帅镜头。有几个画面还蛮屌的。再度证明，玩音乐是把妹杀手锏。当然，只供参考。毕竟，他是周杰伦。

到底什么那么不能说，可从这句话得到一点线索：

“能遇见你已是不可思议了... ...”

Envoy of the Stars @ 5:53 PM
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等一个人咖啡

本周精神粮食主菜是九把刀的《等一个人咖啡》。

当时是在诚品的销售榜上瞄到这本书的。对于九把刀并不陌生。他号称是网络小说经典的制造机，还真不是盖的。自从上次J1去台湾时同样偶然地发现了他所写的《功夫》后，就对他所编织的世界深深着迷。

辗转读了他的一些精典作品，如《狼嚎》、《卧底》、《少林第八铜人》，他说的故事即使科幻离奇，但往往引人入胜。

《等》就跟我看过的九把刀相比下，内容迥异。听书名不难猜，它是爱情小品。

会义无反顾，毫不考虑就买下，有一大半原因应该是书名关系，另外就是咖啡情缘对我这咖啡闲人来说多少有些吸引力。故事围绕着总是握着孤单肯亚（Kenya Coffee）的泽于、女友被女同志抢走的阿拓、怀抱粉红憧憬的女孩、不停捉弄着顾客的老板娘，每个人，都在等一个人。

不琼瑶、非张爱玲式、不洒狗血，味道是刚刚好。咖啡的香，馥郁扑鼻，始终掩盖不了的，却是暖心的温度，所以书里书外，或许仍有人愿意等一个能分享咖啡的人。

Envoy of the Stars @ 5:14 PM
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