Avalon

Together

Friday, June 16, 2006

Loneliness is becoming really stifling at times, especially when it's breathing at your back and you can't exorcise it. The worst thing is, this sudden feeling of loneliness comes in such a subtle form, perpetually out of nowhere, in no exact form, for no reason. Ok maybe there are reasons, but even those are unknown, at least to my conscious mind. I find myself meditating more often now, since we have more free time. But loneliness shows its true prowess when you can't even describe it.

So it's really ironic when we are given nights-out and in the end, you end up lost because you do not know where to go. It was supposed to be a section outing and we did go out as a section, for the first time. But we ended up wandering around Jurong Entertainment Centre and there was a point when we split up. A few of us waited in KFC and stewed and it was at this time when I was eating my mash potatoes when suddenly, the three of the others returned and dramatically placed a small chocolate cake on the table, right in front of me. I looked up and saw one of the guy's grinning expression, coupled with the words "Happy Birthday!" And that was the most unexpectant surprise I ever received. One because I never expected it from the guys, especially guys in NS (no other intentions but NS guys focus on girls more unless they are...) Two because it was all so well-planned I got no wind of it at all, and didn't catch any hints too. It turned out the whole outing was pre-planned for this small celebration event. The splitting up and everything. And I was so guilty that I actually joked that I wanted to go home instead of going out...

I will spare all those unnecessary things about being "touched" and everything with just a simple: "Thank you." And for the birthday song, "thanks guys!" At least this will be a one and only birthday where we march around the parade square so many times (in the rain somemore) and sang stupid songs at the top of our voices just for fun.

Envoy of the Stars @ 11:27 PM
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